If You Think You Want Kids...

We now have PROOF that puppies can ONLY be NOTHING MORE THAN amazing little miracles sent down to earth by some BENEVOLENT deity. Allow me to prove it to you.

In the past three weeks Lila has:

1. learned how to lift the toilet seat with only her nose.

2. learned how to lift the hamper lid with only her nose.

3. kept us up for several nights in a row solely by using her voice to impress upon us the severity of her impending diarrhea. (Dogs are smart.)

4. learned that the easiest way to get chicken for every meal is to have diarrhea every two hours every night for at least three nights in a row. More if you haven't just been spayed. (Oh that's some nice drugs.) (And chicken is apparently good for diarrhea.)

5. learned that white stuff falling from the sky is not only not dandruff but it's also very, very cold and she'd just as soon be inside curled up by the heater. Thank you.

6. learned how to get up on counters/tables/beds/Jenny by using only her gigantic front paws, her extremely well-developed sense of balance, and the magical chicken/sock-sensing springs apparently built into her hind legs. (Handy, those.)

7. learned that, upon making a kill, it is better to sneak your prey (i.e. shoes/socks/underwear) immediately into your den (i.e. crate) rather than consuming it in public (i.e. the living room) in order to maximize the period of consumption available to you in relation to said prey.

8. figured out, MacGuyver-style, how to open the back door using nothing more than a doorknob, a forgotten Christmas jinglebell, and a well-placed nose.

9. learned that, if you can cry loud enough and for long enough, the shower will eventually relinquish your loved ones. But, as we all know, that's a big "if".

10. determined through intensive scientific research that oranges are good to eat, but carrots are really only good for chewing. Or, as we in the scientific community like to say, "masticating".

11. established herself supreme head leader of a puppy coup to take over the world. (This one is not actually true.)








Sugar and spice, man, sugar...and...spice.

I'm Dreaming of a Semi-White Late January Evening in the Desert

"SNOW!...Hey! Everyone's out here!"
Yes. Tucson got snow last night. And it was a momentous and, yes, festive occasion. Upon realizing that frozen water was in fact falling from the sky, people began exiting the warmth of their homes to stand in their yards in their bathrobes and yell things at each other across the street. Things like: "It's snowing!" and "I know! Where do we live again?" and "Wait...who are you?"

You'll get pictures of course, because, like all my neighbors, I took plenty. However it's too late to fight too hard with the computer tonight, and most of you probably don't want to see anymore snow this year anyway, so for now, I'll leave you with a picture of a saguaro in the midst of a veritable winter wonderland, taken this morning, when, once again, the neighbors converged in the streets to wonder at this mid-winter Tucson miracle.
















And our patio:


They cancelled an entire morning of school for this. And you know I can't make these things up.



*tuesday, january 3 update: I indicated above that I would be adding more pictures. I take it all back. Until we get some non-dial-up around here, photos are going to be sparse and my blood pressure is going to remain high.

Lovely Dog Lila

Here's a picture of Lila, looking very grown up:

Kreter Comes Calling

Peter came to visit this past weekend. He lives in Ohio. The following picture shows an example of what Peter cannot do in Ohio in the middle of January:






Peter blessing our beers.



(Hola, Kristi! The beer bucket's always out in welcome for you too!)

Thaied to Technology

Ladies. Gentlemen. Wingal.

I've figured out how to link things. To other things. That means that now, instead of saying, "This is the best quick Thai-style chicken-and-rice soup you ever whipped up on a Monday night" and then writing out the whole recipe for you, I can now do this.

That was one of my resolutions.

Another one is that I resolve to quit posting recipes on my blog while at work.

Resolve This, Baby

I am currently taking requests for New Year's Resolutions.


This is the face of someone who has a lot of things that need Resolving in 2007.

By the way, Happy New Year, all!

Gat-oh my!

I'd like to point out the obvious here.

Gato.
Is a woman.

And maybe you all had your suspicians, but it's been hard for me to come to terms with the whole feline gender-bending thing. Now that I have, I'm trying to move on.

Sadly, now that we finally have that whole female thing in common, I don't see Gato very much anymore. It's too cold to wake up and open the front door for a visit (oy vey, what am I, heating the whole neighborhood!?). And once it warms up on the porch in the afternoon, there's still that draft of cold air coming from inside the house to contend with. Between the cold and the cold, Gato doesn't hang out in front of the door much anymore.

Plus we now spend 24/7 interacting with Lila (i.e. preventing her from ingesting the really really bad stuff). And let's just say that Gato appears to be uninterested in dealing with the trials and tribulations of puppyhood. Even through the security door.

We did reconnect somewhat over the holidays. Gato enjoyed running frantically from my parents each time they turned into the driveway in the morning, and I recently offered her a tin of seafood-flavored cat food rummaged up from the back of the Under-Sink Zone, which she delicately refused. Is that actual seafood? I think not. But I bet Lila would've eaten it.

Interestingly - and perhaps hilariously - Gato's ratio of cat-to-fur evidently decreased considerably with the onset of this chilly weather. She lately resembles a large, black dust bunny, complete with pieces of things stuck in there that you can't identify and would prefer not to. She is a round meowing mass of fur waddling around the porch.



I'd like to bring her inside for a hot toddy (or whatever it is cats like to warm up and chill out with) and some girl-talk from time to time. But it's so damn cold inside the casita that, even with her explosive fur and all, she's probably better off taking her chances with the elements.