where I've been

I almost made it a whole month without reaching the level of motivation required to blog about things, and I wish I could tell you all about all the exciting things that have been keeping me busy and preoccupied during the last few weeks, but things just haven't been all that exciting lately. Or at least not exciting in the right ways.

Here are the most exciting things that have happened recently, in no particular order except for the first one and also the last one:

1. Raphael became a United States citizen. It's all very rewarding. I went to the ceremony and sat next to a guy from Palestine whose mother was getting her citizenship. He'd been to seven of these, he told me, and he did seem slightly less enthusiastic about being there than, say, the smiley blonde woman who sat in the front row and whose husband kept running up to videotape her waving her little flag from various angles. Raphael refused to wave his little flag, but he still wound up naturalized, no thanks to the actual immigration people. The presiding judge, by the way, looked and sounded just like a mildly Hispanic Alec Trebec which I found interesting, but which probably isn't ultimately significant in any way. Or maybe it is since we were in jeopardy for awhile, and now we're big winners.

2. We bathed Lila. Bedraggled dog cracks me up every time.

3. I grilled a pizza for the first time, and liked it so much that I grilled another one the following night, and now I can't stop thinking about grilling pizzas.

4. I had a story rejected from our college literary journal, but a photograph accepted. So I feel affirmed and happy.

5. Mmmm. Grilled pizza.

6. It hit 100 degrees at precisely 1:53 p.m. two Wednesdays ago (according to the people who keep track of these things) for the first time this summer. And also, right around 1:53 p.m. on that Wednesday, I lost every last one of my three house keys. Probably because my brain was too hot. Incidentally, it's hit 100 degrees just about every afternoon since, and I haven't found my house keys either.

7. The zucchini plant has taken over the box garden and now has the cherry tomato plant on a chain, much like Jabba the Hut and Princess Leia. It's also starting to demand things. Like cheesecake.

8. We turned the swamp cooler on last week for the first time. The pump was broken, which means no water was getting to the pad which means the whole "evaporative" part of "evaporative cooler" was...well, it was stupid. Just ridiculously stupid. Honestly. Because did I mention that it was over a hundred degrees out at that point? Which translates to about 85 degrees in the house. So Raphael did his magic, and now when we wake up in the morning, we have to put on sweaters and complain about how we're not hot anymore what's up with that? Which is exactly how it should be.

9. Lila ate FIVE CUPS of grass which had to be surgically removed from her stomach yesterday afternoon. Surgically. Removed.

10. Raphael and I decided that we're in the small percentage of the population that has to have pet insurance.

11. Surgically.

12. Mmmm. Grilled pizza.