Tuesday, October 28

happy thoughts of singing vegetables

It is highly unlikely that we will be deported before Christmas. Of course, if things go as planned, we will not be deported at all. And if we learn before Christmas that we won't be deported, it'll be the happiest Christmas ever. It’ll be happier than the time the Grinch brought back all those presents to the Whos of Whoville and got to carve the Roast Beast. Happier than the time Scrooge popped in on the Cratchits with that giant turkey. Happier than that thing that went down in the Muppet Christmas movie, whatever it was, with the singing vegetables and the rats and that chick with the wonky teeth and everything.

It would simply be the Best Christmas Ever.

But I’m just not convinced that the government likes us that much.

The latest news is that this thing will most likely drag on for months, if not longer, depending on...well. The next part of that sentence contains words I’m not really supposed to know. So I'll leave it at that. Let’s just say I won’t be sending a festive Christmas wreath down to the folks at the USCIS office this holiday season.

With that in mind, it’s becoming increasingly important that we don’t dwell on things. It’s becoming increasingly important that we come up with happy thoughts about deportation instead of focusing on all the nasty-wasty little niggley ones that keep popping up at inconvenient times. Like this one that occurred as I was microwaving some soup earlier today: "Psst. Psst. Hey. Hey, Jenny. Hey! If you get deported, your dog will have to stay in quarantine in Guatemala City for, like a month. Or three months. Heh heh. Yeah. Maybe more. Maybe a year."

And this one: "You know how they'll probably treat your dog while she's in quarantine in Guatemala City, right? Heh heh."

Right. Those types of thoughts just won't do anymore. If we keep entertaining those types of thoughts, by mid-November, we'll be so angry and depressed that the dog will begin to believe she'd be better off in quarantine anyway.

We’re trying to focus instead on the positive. The most positive thing that’s come of this so far (and there are…oh so many positive aspects of it. Just. So many.) is the amazing, selfless, just purely kind support so many of our friends and family have offered us since the whole ordeal was kicked off this past summer. An ordeal, I might add, that is apparently only beginning. Yay. Financially, this will be hard, yes, but it’s the emotional toll that would be the real killer if we hadn't suddenly found ourselves suspended by this net of support that has suddenly tightened up around us. That’s really what’s going to get us through it.

It’s making me go all teary-eyed right now, in fact. I love you guys, man. Thank you. If I could bake you all a batch of spoon cookies just for your own selves, I would. But the thought of it is, frankly, almost more than I can bear, considering my fragile emotional state and all. And also the fact that such an undertaking would take about six years to complete, considering how many of you have offered your support and also considering how the making of spoon cookies is so horrendously time-consuming and ultimately produces such low yields. Much like the naturalization process, apparently.

As I make a feeble attempt to wrap this post up with some kind of conclusion that effectively ties the Grinch, deportation, and holiday spoon cookies into some kind of coherent and meaningful package, I...just can’t. The day has simply been too long. The last couple of months have simply been too long. Sorry.


julie said...

Jenny, you don't have to make spoon cookies. I'm pretty Jack wouldn't eat them anyway - he thinks they're vegetables. But even if you do have to move to Guatemala, the support won't end there. We'll just have to travel a little farther to visit you!

Wingal said...

If I could provide anything more than moral support, I would. But all I have for you is love, best wishes, and some vegetables singing... in SPANISH!!!

Anonymous said...

can you marry? would that fix it? then you can stay?

Jen said...

Ugh. *hug* What an icky process. I'm guessing that because this whole ball of wax is already rolling, it's no longer as simple as just getting married (since then they'd be suspicious that you just did it to keep the Guatamalan here, versus because you've been living together and madly in love for...oh...years?!). Anyway, your support net certainly extends up into Cleveland, OH. I'm thinking of you guys and sending lots and lots of positive thoughts and warm fuzzies your way.

Jenny said...

I'm sketchy about the whole thing, but my understanding is that marriage itself won't prove that Raphael came here legally and has been here legally for the past ten years or so.

It's sort of a chicken/egg thing. Sort of. If we say "screw it, let's just get married and use THAT to make him legal" (assuming that it would work singlehandely at this point - I'm not sure), the problem becomes that the USCIS can officially label him illegal (since we've declined to prove otherwise) and he'll be forever haunted by a false criminal record. Meaning, getting licensed someday as an architect could be a problem. Among other things, I'm sure. On top of which, he's NOT a criminal.

Hmm. I don't know if that really falls into the chicken/egg category after all. It's not really about what came first - it's more about what we're willing to sacrifice. And we want to fight for his rights. To party legally in America. We've got all the documents, all the dates, all the witnesses to prove that his Green Card is valid. Not to mention, we've got a Green Card.

Anyway. I could go on for paragraphs more. But I won't.

Thanks again.

becky said...

Jenny, I'm praying for you and yours. Take care, keep your chin up, life has a way of working out, although at times it nearly beats the crap out of us, eh?

Hope you have a fun Halloween. And please make a yummy almond cake and then post the recipe, I really need a good tried and true almond cake recipe!

Jenny said...

Ooh! A mission! A mission always makes me feel better!

(Thanks, Becky!)

Charity said...

We have some friends who are also going through some "possibly being deported" issues. I feel so confused and angry when I think about our immigration laws and how they are applied to the people I care about (and the people they care about). From our friends' experience, the drawn-out bureaucratic process seems to be on their side (they've so far been allowed to stay because the process takes so darned long), provided they can handle the uncertainty and can keep shoveling money into the problem. I suppose that's not much comfort. But I am thinking about you guys.